It Wasn’t Love, But The Scariest Part Is I Was Sure It Was


It wasn’t even love on that first night when you met me at that party. It was never a sweet first and romantic kiss, but a rough and domineering takeover.


It wasn’t love when you never called me back.
 It wasn’t love when you made me feel like a burden every time I initiated a conversation. It wasn’t love when you made feel dumb and insignificant. It wasn’t love when you tore me down, to build your own self up.

It wasn’t love when you made me change the shirt I was wearing because it showed off too much of what you said that you “owned.” It wasn’t love when you yelled at me for choosing to hang out with my friends, over you. It wasn’t love when you ordered me to get your permission before I left my house.

It wasn’t love when you lashed out at me for not answering the phone only once. It wasn’t love when you called me over and over again and sent me nasty text messages while I was at work and couldn’t talk on the phone. It wasn’t love when you screamed at me threw the phone telling me that I better never ignore your call again.

It wasn’t love when you cheated on me with other girls behind my back, and then lied straight to my face about it. It wasn’t love when you got angry at me for not believing you or when you made me feel like I was crazy for wondering where you were.

It wasn’t love when you grabbed my hand and squeezed it as hard as you could because another guy was talking me. It wasn’t love when you told me to never speak to another man without your permission ever again.

It wasn’t love when you called me a slut out jealousy that should have never been present.
 It wasn’t love when you called me useless, and it wasn’t love when you told how hard I was to love. It wasn’t love when you told me nobody else could ever love me.

It wasn’t love, and it was never love, but the scariest part about it, is that I thought that it was.

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24 Comments Add yours

  1. Manveen kaur says:

    This is one of those posts which can make you feel the words and the pain behind it. Great work😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you so much!! Truly means a lot.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Manveen kaur says:

    Pleasure is all mine😊

    Like

  3. Aasiyah says:

    This was honestly so good! I just know you’re going to be published someday!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you so much!! It honestly means so much to me that you believe that ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  4. notestowomen says:

    You can actually feel the rawness of the emotions and the pain she is experiencing. Very vivid and moving writing. You have great talent.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you so much. That truly makes my day that you think so 😊

      Like

  5. A n R says:

    How can this be so relatable?Every post of yours inspires me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Awe I’m glad!! Thank you 😊😊

      Like

  6. A n R says:

    Dis is so relatable! You inspire me with every post of yours ma’am

    Liked by 1 person

  7. simplymesmc says:

    OMG… i feel every emotions of this piece. You are a great story teller.

    Like

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you so much. Really means a lot ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Great job!
    I just recently went through this and totally understand. Beautiful work.

    Like

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you!! I’m sorry to hear you recently went through this but also so happy at the same time that you were strong and brave enough to! ❤

      Like

      1. You have to, life keeps moving he wasn’t good enough anyway. 🙂

        Like

      2. Scattered Scripturient says:

        Definitely not 😊

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Keith says:

    The courage to stand your ground is refreshing and admirable. The power and freedom to say “no more” is exhilarating. Well done, Keith

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Yes, it often times takes more courage to get out of a bad situation, rather than to stay in one. Thanks for reading!

      Like

  10. jenval8 says:

    Beautiful work, you are really good indeed. Great job hun.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you!! 😊😊 glad you enjoyed it!

      Like

  11. Price Mwandodo says:

    Hey Scripturient, your blog has been nothing but a great source of inspiration to young upcoming writers and bloggers like myself. Great read, loved it all. Kudos, http://www.pricemwandodo.wordpress.com Read comment correct share and follow.

    Biggest fan from Kenya.

    Like

    1. Scattered Scripturient says:

      Thank you so much!!! I will check yours out 😊😊

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Price Mwandodo says:

        Thank you I am humbled. Your posts are very encouraging and surreal

        Like

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